Day 46 I'm Ready!

I'm busy getting my things ready for Vancouver. I'm feeling pretty good about the new things I bought for the trip and this morning I was rummaging through my drawers and found a pair of pants that I bought eons ago and have never worn (the tags were still hanging from them)! Size 18 and they fit perfectly! I had my own fashion show this morning (just for me)...trying on new things...mixing and matching so that I now have several outfits from a few choice pieces. Whether or not I look thinner in my new duds the important thing is that I feel thinner...more fit and more than anything else, I feel less self conscious about my weight than I normally do!

I'm pumped, but Mr. Soontobeskinnygirl is even more pumped! Go figure! He balked at the idea originally, which of course led to me begging and pleading, until I finally said I was going alone regardless of what he decided. Now it's him that's bragging it up to his friends! I think we should have a good time if we can survive the large crowds! Arrgggh...I really don't like big crowds but I think in general there's going to be a lot of excitement so it'll be fine.

I wish now that I'd given myself a few more days. My time there is going to buzz by quicker than I want. I'm not sure how much I'll see my daughter and her beau, other than early mornings and evenings. I'm also hoping to get together with my sis who'll be there a few days after we arrive. For now I'm not going to worry to much about making plans. It should all fall into place once we arrive.

So..wish me luck! I hope you all have a great week! I'm not sure if I'll be on to post or not while I'm away, but I'll be looking forward to my weigh in once I'm back, because I'm determined to lose!

Day 45 "Do YOU Believe?"

I'm sure by now you all know that Canada won it's first gold medal in Vancouver! Not just the first IN Vancouver, but it's the first gold won in an Olympics held in our own country. Big stuff. HUGE! Congratulatons Alexandre Bilodeau! I watched his mogul run and all of the interviews afterwards, including the one with his family. His older brother Frederic was born with cerebral palsy and was told he wouldn't walk after the age of 10. He's now 28 and still walking. According to his younger brother and our new gold medal champ, he never complains about his condition, nor lets it get in the way of things he wants to do. Alex calls him his hero and the inspiration behind his winnings. I can see why.

It was all so touching. I shed more than a few tears watching it. The first when Alex won his race and more again as they showed Frederic cheering wildly from the sidelines.

I started to think how dedicated these athletes are. How something like that can inspire them to do the almost impossible. How hard they train to become champions. I really don't know what the diets of these hard working athletes is, but I can guess that they're not often stuffing their faces with junk food or drinking diet pop. Not because they might not crave a loaded two ton cheeseburger and in Alex's case a Poutine (fries, topped with cheese curds and gravy for those of you that don't know), but because they know they can't. Not if they want to do well. I can guess too, that they're not talking themselves out of some grueling workout because they're too lazy to do it. They push. They push and push themselves to unbelievable limits. I'm sure there are times they'd like to quit. I'm sure there are tears. I'm almost positive there are disappointments, but they keep moving forward, always striving to win.

I'm sure you see where I'm going with this.

If Alex can push himself to win...if Jennifer Heil, Hannah Kearney and even Frederic can do it. Then why can't I? I can do the seemingly impossible...can't I? Perhaps the theme of our 2010 Olympics fits well into our healthier lifestyle vision..."Do you believe?"

I do!

Day 44 Happy Valentines Day! (and a good weigh day too!)

Down 3.6! My best loss to date! I can't say that I did anything different, but something worked. It would be easy to for me to say that I had a perfect week but I did have a few very unnecessary cheats. :-( I have to keep reminding myself that this is a learning process. Something I want to carry with me for the rest of my life. (Rome wasn't built in a day) I'm becoming more and more aware of what I'm putting in my mouth, often thinking of the consequences BEFORE I do and I'm recognizing how even a small amount of daily physical exercise helps me to lose weight and more importantly feel better. My goal for this upcoming week...to be under that 100 pound mark...it's so very near! I can do it even when I'm in Vancouver for the Olympics!

The nice thing about Vancouver, for those of you that have never been, is that it's a very "health conscious" city. Of all the cities I've been too (and it's not like I'm some seasoned world traveller), I'm always aware that people there appear to be thinner and much more active. Perhaps it's the weather and the fact that it's always easier to do outdoor activities when you're not fighting a few feet of snow, a sidewalk that's better for skating than it is walking or running or, as in my case, frigid temps. Whatever the reason, I always feel a inspired to take better care of myself when I'm there.

On an entirely different topic, I went shopping with my sis yesterday. The entire day! I have to say that I endured it well. Afterwards, I found that I wasn't so much physically tired, (you know what I mean...when you're shopping endlessly and your head starts to fog and just putting one foot in front of the other seems to take every ounce of energy you can muster) I was just tired of "looking". In the end, I bought a heap of things and spent FAR too much money (don't tell my hubby) but I'm really happy with my purchases. I was careful to buy things that would continue to wear well as I drop the weight. It's really difficult to always "look nice" in big baggy pants and shirts that hang shapelessly from your shoulders. It's even more difficult to pull out your wallet and buy something that you'll know won't fit you forever. I'd like to think the money I spent yesterday was well spent. That the "boyfriend" cardigan I purchased has months if not years of use and that more than anything, I'm going to feel better about myself in my new and better fitting duds.

That said...it's time to get physical....

Happy Valentine's day to you all! Make it special!

Day 42 Quickie

Get your mind out of the gutter.

I don't have a lot of time. As usual, I'm rushing around with little time left before I need to leave for work. I haven't been on these past few days...damned work is cutting into my blogging!

I'd love to say things have been going perfectly, but I've had a few cheats. Little things, but cheats non the less. It's not easy working in a bakery! I am determined though to LOSE weight while doing it...hoping I'll surprise EVERYONE! Yesterday they brought out a new pastry for Saturdays. A Saskatoon berry, cream cheese sort of danish. I told myself I'd try one bite...but that led to two and then three. It's very good! Probably better than both the Pain au Chocolate and the Caramel Apple Brioche put together. Thank god I don't normally work a Saturday.

The good news is I weighed myself this morning and I'm down...in fact...*whispers*...according to my scale, I've hit my 10 pounds! We'll see Sunday. That's when I'll have my official weigh day this week because I'm watching the Olympic Opening Ceremonies at my sister's tonight and staying in the city so that I can shop for a few new things before I'm off to the Olympics! I'm a little apprehensive but excited about the possibily of going down a size AND finding shoes to fit my "little less than square" feet!

I'm watching my cals today so that I don't have to worry to much about tonight. I don't think we're having much as we watch the Opening Ceremonies, but even so, my biggest challenge is when I'm eating at something like that. I'm going to try not to worry so much about calories as I am about portions. Little bits...eat slowly. The last time I was at her house for a movie night, we made up a bit of an antipasto platter and I swear we all took a few deep breaths and inhaled it in a matter of seconds!

*fingers crossed* for a good Sunday weigh in and good luck on your weigh ins as well!

See you then!

Day 39 Self Control

I've had a good week. An excellent week. I've planned my meals in advance, which I'm finding works best for me. I'm now switching between two breakfasts...one I call my morning gruel...steel cut oats, oat bran, flax seed and a little cinnamon, poured over a 1/2 cup of blueberries and eaten with natural soy milk (unsweetened)...the second my spinach and feta egg white omelet. Both seem to sustain me through the morning, until I have either my lunch or on work days when I eat lunch quite late, my smoothie. My dinners are an entirely different thing. I do need to plan them in advance, even so much as figuring how many calories I can eat through the day so that I can have the dinner I'm planning. (If that makes any sense) Needless to say we've been eating very well and super healthy. Tonight I made the Italian Meatballs in Tomato Sauce I was going to make the other day (to eat either tomorrow night or Thursday because this dish gets better when it's a few days old). I even figured out the calorie count on SparkRecipes...thanks to whomever suggested that!

I'm still measuring EVERYTHING. I'll measure the 10 portions my Italian Meatballs will serve so that I know exactly what I'm eating. My husband thinks I'm crazy. He can't believe I spoon out our dinners with a measuring cup and spoon equal portions into little plastic containers for lunch the next day or to freeze for another meal. He of course gets to eat more. That wasn't always the case. I could eat as much as him and most often our portions were equal.

Control freak that I am, I really do NEED to do this. Forever? Who knows. Maybe one day I'll recognize a normal portion without the measuring cup but for now it's what I need to do. I feel a little nervous going out for dinner...somewhere other than home. The other night I had dinner at my mom's. I made it. My eighty year old mother tends to make far too much...not only portion wise but in variety. She'll have potatoes AND rice, or noodles as a side dish, along with a whole lot of other things....often fried. It's not that I don't like her cooking, because generally I do. In fact I had dinner there a week or so ago as well and it was delicious. But I ate far too much...like I always do when I'm there. There's something about eating at my mom's and wanting to eat a LOT. Too much. It's like I lose control. I'll admit that she pushes..."oh...try some of this"..."a little of that won't hurt you". Strange really because my mom is always "hinting" that I should lose weight and then when I'm trying, she'll tell me I "can have a little". Just you wait until I lose a lot...she's sure to tell me I'm getting "too thin".

Anyway, bringing dinner to her...a low cal, uber delicious dinner felt good. I didn't overeat. In fact, I ate what I had measured out on my plate and nothing more. I didn't indulge in the individual packets of dried cranberries or the mixed nuts she'd set out after dinner...I didn't have the apple juice she kept pushing on me and I didn't have the scone.

Next week I fly to Vancouver for the Olympics! I'm excited! I'm also a little worried about "undoing" what I've done. I'm worried about eating out...eating too much...eating the right stuff. I'm going to have to work very hard at portion control and get over the fact that I can't track the calories because more often than not, I'm not going to know. The good news is that I'll be walking...miles and miles...so that'll be good.

I'm hoping I can continue to blog...to read your posts, to share what I've been doing. I'm finding I need you....your comments and your blog posts...for those pats on the back and the motivating stories that keep me just that...motivated.

I'm off to bed...night night!

Day 38 Hurting...

Not horribly. In fact, not to bad at all. A little stiff. Tomorrow will probably be worse. I didn't snowshoe the entire trail...unlike my husband who did it twice! I took a short cut...blazed my own trail, which was probably more work than if I'd followed the beaten path! It was really too cold, even though I broke into a sweat with all the huffing and puffing. I'm never sure how to dress, because I seem to always be cold lately and so I needed to bundle up at the start. By the end my jacket was unzipped and the scarf I had twisted around my neck and face was hanging.

It felt great! I'm going to push myself to do it again tomorrow if it warms up a little. -30C today. Much too chilly (Mr. Soontobeskinnygirl however, is a die hard!)

I'm pretty proud of myself because I've also been forcing myself to keep up with the walking videos. I still can't believe how quickly the 30 minutes go. Lately it seems I just barely begin and it's over. I know eventually I'll have to move on to something more difficult but for now I'm loving them!

This old computer I'm using hasn't any sound...god only knows where it went. So I don't have any audio while I'm following Leslie as she marches to the beat. It doesn't really matter much. I pretty much have her memorized. I do however miss something she says about mid way through the video...I can't quote it word for word but you'll get the jist. She asks if you've ever worked out and asked yourself why you did, because you didn't like it. Then she goes on to say that you ALWAYS feel great after doing it. It's true for me....I wonder if it's true for you too?

Day 37 I Think I Can....

I'm going to attempt snowshoeing today. I've done it before...last year...and I made it. I didn't fall over dead like I thought I might. In fact Mr. Soontobeskinnygirl was pretty amazed at how well I kept up. I suffered for it eventually and had to see a massage therapist for a pull in my side. Seems I have a weak core (which I'm working on) and that lifting my leg to snowshoe was pulling things that really didn't want to be pulled.

It's not that I think I'm in much better shape than I was then, but I have been doing knee lifts when working out. I'm also feeling better...peppier and well, truth is he's broken the trail so that in inself is easier. We have a big yard...10 acres or so and he weaves in and out of the shelterbelt (trees), down a few steeper hills and through a field. I plan to take it at my own pace. I don't think I can keep up with him and like last year I broke my own trail back to the house when I thought enough was enough.

According to my Lose It app, 30 minutes burns 392 calories. I'm sure that's not for someone 100 pounds overweight so I'll burn more...

If I can last the 30 minutes....

I'll fill you in tomorrow...

Day 36 Weigh Day!

235! I'm doing the happy dance! Slow and steady...I have to keep telling myself that and honestly, I can see....I can "feel" that my first 10 pounds is just around the corner! If I think of it in small steps... if I think that just a little more than those 10 pounds will mean I have less than 100 to lose... that seems so much more attainable, doesn't it?

Thinking of it in terms of a whole loss...100+ pounds just seems so far away. But it's already the first week in February. Time really does fly!! I'm learning a lot about my body and how it reacts to different foods. What works and what doesn't. I'm also much more conscious of what I put in my mouth and to be honest the calorie counting seems the way to go for me. When I'm considering a small piece of cookie or something equally unnecessary, I KNOW that 1/8 of that cookie and 50 calories later, it's just not worth it!

Thank you all for your kind words and for sharing your knowledge with me. You make it all just a little easier and of course reading your stories continues to motivate me!

My dinner last night was fab. I looked up the caloric count for the particular restaurant we ate at and didn't feel at all guilty eating the Pecan Crusted Chicken Rocket Salad at 445 calories. (with a goat cheese coulis and thin wedges of pear...candied pecans and roasted beets! Yummy!)

Well, if 2+ pounds hasn't inspired me to have a great week....nothing will!!!

Best to you all! I'll be reading you shortly!

Day 35 Feeling Groovy...

That's right...feeling groovy! I think I can almost see the faint outline of a collarbone this morning...especially if I lift my neck high. It's true...and my pants are quite loose! Rarely do I say this, but...I can hardly weight..oops...wait *S* to step on the scale tomorrow!

It's been a good week...even with the occasional cheat. I did sneak a small piece of raspberry cheesecake brownie at work the other day. Just a bite. But I stopped there. I told myself just one piece! Yeah me!

The temptations at the patisserie are unimaginable. We have samples set out ALL day and if that's not enough there are always bowls of "end pieces" and "flops" sitting on the table in the lunchroom. I can resist the chocolate. It's not that I don't like chocolate...'cos I do...but I love lemon more...so it's the lemony things that call my name...loudly...far to often. I've learned to push the bowls to the end of the table so they're not staring at me, beckoning me to taste. It's a little like the evil witch from Snow White. Just one bite....

I've also made of point of eating basically the same things for breakfast and lunch. I find the less I think the easier it is for me to follow my plan. I whip up a spinach and feta omelet each morning...one egg, two egg whites. I always eat an orange with that because I've read the iron in spinach is absorbed better with vitamin C. (Am I eating too many eggs?) For lunches, it's been salad. Spring greens, though this time around I have baby butter lettuce mixed with spinach and oh...it's to nice! I toss a tablespoon of mixed sunflower and pumpkin seeds on top for crunch...a tablespoon of dried cranberries...either a little feta or 1% cottage cheese and then my 1 tsp of Cilanto Lime Dressing, mixed with with 2 tsp. of lime juice. It's working because even that one teaspoon of the dressing is just so flavourful(Stonewall Kitchen for all you Americans...it's made there! Lucky you!) and the lime juice is enough to coat my greens. I also find the feta or more so the cottage cheese mixes up and makes it all creamy!

About three hours after my breakfast, I have my smoothie. That seems to tide me over until I have lunch which is quite late (2ish). I always have a small baggie (10 to be exact) of unblanched almonds in my pocket for that mid afternoon sugar crave...and a small fruit or raw veggies. I can snack on those as I work.

So dinner is a little more challenging, especially when I come home in starvation mode. I really need to plan better. Make things up in advance. Better yet teach my husband to cook on the days he's home before me! Tonight we're going out for dinner with friends. I'm not at all worried. I don't find eating out a problem because there are lots of options and lots of things I can do to avoid extra fats, etc...dressing on the side...dry toast...baked potato with nothing on it. But I do avoid anything fast food...that seems much harder to adjust.

Time to go...

Hoping you all have a groovy day as well!

Day 35 The Right Plan for the Right Person

I'll make this quick. I'm using the dinosaur (it's roaring away here as I type). At least I have SOMETHING in the way of a computer. Because mine was down, I haven't done my walking video for a few days. Yes I know what you're thinking..."you could have done something else". True enough. Walking outside is a bit of a pain because we have so much snow and ummmm...well, I don't have winter boots (yes I DO live in Canada and it's true that it not only gets cold but BLOODY cold...but even then most of us don't dress properly for winter). So back at it today. I don't have any sound (for some reason this old thing doesn't have it anymore), but I pretty much know it off by heart now anyway.

I cheated a little yesterday. I brought home a roasted chicken from the grocery store and I was starving by the time I got home. So I didn't measure...I ate chicken and more chicken. I also had a salad with it, though I didn't measure the dressing, which I feel terribly guilty about. I did weigh myself this morning. I have to admit to doing it daily even when I know I shouldn't! :-( But....this morning I was down even more, so now instead of sulking about my cheats, I'm feeling inspired once again!

I'm following this diet that I bought a year or so ago. Well, not so much diet but eating plan. It's by a Canadian MD. Precision Nutrition. Its all about eating every 3 or 4 hours...always including a protein with a "feed" and a lot of veggies or fruit. It reads a lot like a body building plan, and for some it is, but he makes some good points about why we need more protein and less carbs...or at least eat the carbs after you've exercised. I've said before that I'm not against eating carbs in the way of veggies or fruits...not even so much in the way of whole grain pastas, and cereals. It's the bread for me. I honestly do really well following the plan. I mean REALLY well (hopefully Saturday will tell the tale!). It does feel like you're eating all the time...and seriously a "feed" is so appropriate because it's definitely that! Sometimes it's hard to do at work. I forget what time it is...miss a feed...eat it late...hence the hunger last night.

I don't think there's a trick to losing the pounds. We all know that. I do believe though it's finding the right plan for you. Maybe this is mine?

I'm going to set my alarm on my cell phone today. When that bell strikes, I'm going to pull my Four Berry Smoothie (soy milk, mixed frozen berries, protein powder and greens plus) from the fridge and drink it. On time. No excuses.

I'm off to make my lunch...my smoothie...take my vitamins and drink my water...

Have a great day!

Day 33 Purging!

Alrighty. I am writing this on my iPod Touch because my &!/x@(- computer has bit the dust. I'm thinking this time it's for good because I have spent far too much money on repairs already and with the price of a new PC being what it is I am convinced it's not worth my while fixing it. Unfortunately I don't have the cash to buy a new one right now... But thank gawd my daughter pawned her iPod off on me!

So today I seem to have lots of time on my hands because I haven't spent countless hours reading blogs, looking up recipes or any of those web addictions I am afflicted with. (Don't get me wrong I love your blogs!). Instead I am going through my pantry and refridgerator, tossing things I shouldn't have in the house (suprisingly few) and things that have been around FAR too long (I can honestly say there are a few unidentifable item!) It feels good to do it. It feels "healthy". You read about it but until you do it yourself you don't appreciate how satisfying it can be. One of the things I have learned about myself is that I like order. Not only do I like it but it's something that I really do need for my well being. EVERYTHING works better when I am organized. That includes eating right and working out. My head feels clearer and I am definitely more focused.

I'm going to sort through the food items I have on hand and start using things up so that my grocery inventory isn't so big. Buy only what I need. Make grocery lists and stick to them. Prepare meals in advance when I can (black bean burgers and Italian spaghetti and meatballs today). The worst thing I find when I am watching what I eat and trying to lose weight is when I have nothing in the house and so instead I'll eat anything and usually everything... Never quite finding what I want. I probably don't need to say more about that. Somehow I doubt I am alone.

My index finger is getting tired!

Here's to "renewal".